October 5, 1995
Do not look at it (he means something that happened to the recipient of the letter), as a punishment or something that is irrelevant to your own action. Its implementation was prolonged, because that is the length of time you had to be tried and tested this time.
You must build yourself up, the time has come and the more you avoid it the stronger the reaction becomes.
Mistakes are still acceptable, but the time needed to correct them as well as their impact grows, in order for you to realize more quickly. Deep within yourself you know your mistakes.
Forgiveness and humility. Stop contesting for yourself and God will take care of you. Look farther ahead. Truth always lies far away, and you are looking directly in front of you.
Become humble. You have learned to take and demand. No one owes you anything, nor will he give you anything as long as you carry on this tactic. Humble your self, accept the other's gift as a gift from God and not as his own obligation. The more you ask, the more you'll lose.
Learn to give.
The others are at their own level of maturity and are judged differently. What is asked of you is this: give with humbleness, without expecting reciprocation, not even in the depths of your soul. The selfishness that they taught you is not for you; get rid of it.
The more you ask, the more you'll lose.
You don't need what you think you do, to live happily.
Learn again how to love, yourself, others, and only then will you see the truth you are dreaming of. You don't need the way of life that is valid for the others. You are different.
God loves you, that's why you must work harder. Don't compare yourself with others. You don't even need as much help as you think you do. Be strong. Stop being an infant emotionally, God has given you all the aids up until now so as to achieve this.
No one is punishing you, as you believe. God has favoured you to have known the truth, to have searched, and gives you opportunities to stop acting self-destructively.
Chase away fear. Fear gathers elementals around you, which feed on your prana. That's why you cannot ..... (he refers to a specific activity of the recipient of the letter). Remember to ...... Use the gift of God for your own purposes and not for those of darkness. Forget reciprocation. You don't give to receive, because then you lose what you have as well.
Love the winter and the night and then summer and day will love you. Humble your self in order to love it. Do not rush. The truth is in front of you and you are kicking it farther away. That, which seems far away to you, is simply invisible. Leave your eyes open and then you will see it. Trust the power without requesting. God knows what you need, God hears better that which you do not voice.
Work humbly, without expectation. The result of your work is not what you think it is. Don't ask for credentials in order to work. This is selfishness.
You asked to see me. You asked to hear me and that's why I came. Just because God loves you, does not mean that you will escape from your work. Ask for the difficulties in order to hear the messages of God.
Work, not as it is conventionally considered. Don't let dreams become a reality for you. You know the truth, don't forget it, do not make it into a dream, do not avoid it, because then turmoil increases.
Accept your self and forgive it so that it can move on.
Allow your chest to live. You are killing it by filling it with elementals.
Isolate yourself in work. The circumstantial result, the failure of the moment shouldn't change the course of the ship. Learn to live with the storms, and swim in the seas of your nightmares. You wanted to move on, you strongly desired to find God, and you were given the way. So you mustn't back off. The hand has been held out to you, and suddenly you doubt its existence.
Small steps are no longer for you. You asked to be with God and the small steps you use as an alibi are not valid in your case.
Show magnanimity. You are faint-hearted when you ask your beloved ones to bear your burden. Don't think too much. Don't talk too much. Too much talking from others disorientates you. You can talk only with those you already know and only when the way is open.
Put what you know into action. The road which seems lonely to you, is full of life. Open your eyes to see life.
Untie the knots at home. You know how: do what you ask for. Then you will receive what you no longer ask for.
Humble your self so that you rise. You no longer need praises because you wished to grow up. Praises are not love.
Don't make mistakes. Enlighten your soul, push away the past and its associated bonds that block you. You've got everything you asked for: but you are only working on it superficially, and this is not your true deed. You work on the surface, because you are afraid to reach the bottom, and you create alibis that you supposedly work as much as you should. For as long as you do not reach the bottom, the surface cannot change. Your life – externally – won't change, while you do not decide to work in depth.
It is not easy. But easy is not what you asked for. Therefore busy yourself with what you asked for and was given to you. Don't ask to be given something you haven't earned. What you ask for, you have not earned, that's why it doesn't come. Concern yourself with earning it, and not with asking for it. Don't become a beggar: become a worker.
Humble yourself. Do good without expecting good from the others. Give without competitiveness. Forget the parental past and allow yourself to feel safe. Work the light you have. Believe that you can and you will be able to. God is not punishing you, because God loves you. God does not want you to be punished so don't do it to yourself.
Stop punishing yourself, start loving. Experience silence, tranquility, trust, light. Do not let the darkness conquer you. Then people, who love your light and want you to be bright, distance themselves from you. Experience this temporary isolation as a gift from God, do not burden it with more upset, words and anxiety, which chase the light even farther away.
Reread what you have written. Let it live in your heart. God trusts you. I will come again whenever you need me. Pray. Don't think of the future. Let it live quietly by itself. God blesses you.
Zandos